Minka Kelly Dates Fez, Paltrow Still A Bitch

Oh Golly! Hottie Minka Kelly, dumbass Wilmer Valderrama and Mayor of Bitch County Gwyneth Paltrow in one post. This should be a good run.

The Daily News reports:

A source at Beacher’s Madhouse on Saturday night spotted Wilmer Valderrama exit the Hollywood club to escort Kelly and her friend inside. “He didn’t need to come outside and get her,” said the insider, who added that Kelly, who arrived at 12:45 a.m., could have gained access on her own accord, and that Valderamma had arrived earlier in the evening with Hayden Panettiere and a few others.

Basically, because that’s how gossip works, the dude came out to say “hi” and thus he’s having sex with the girl. Otherwise it would be boring. I also love this Source guy, he always has the scoop on everything. The conversation went like this:

Bouncer: Go inside miss Kelly, you’re in the list.

Wilmer: Oh, Hai! I want to fuck you!

Minka: Ok! lets do it!

Hayden: I wanna join too!

Now that would be news. Bunch of fuckers.

Gwyneth Paltrow’s anti-social behavior raised a few well-threaded eyebrows at the Women in Film pre-Oscar celebration. A source who attended the cocktail reception tells us that Paltrow, who was billed as the host of the soiree at Ciccone’s on Friday, didn’t exactly mingle with the mostly female crowd that included Octavia Spencer, Vanessa Hudgens, Selena Gomez and Viola Davis.

How dare she! fourty years old shall always mingle with teenagers. I’m 32 years old and always hang with teenagers. Gwyneth wouldn’t go to jail for it, though. (don’t judge me)

Paltrow spent almost the entire time talking to her mother,

Bullshit. She basically grabbed her phone and sang “Mother” by Danzig, except that she changed the lyrics to promote her awesome blog in which she explains shit about relationships.

In a nutshell, this is a crock of shit.

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